Some Excerpts:

VICTORIA: Bat! What on earth are you doing here?

BELFRY:  AAAHHHH! You scared me half to death! It’s not nice to sneak up on people like that! I could have had a heart attack!

VICTORIA: You’d need a heart for that, wouldn’t you?

BELFRY:  Very amusing. I’ll use it at next year’s Villain’s Banquet. What are you doing here?

VICTORIA: I work here. You wanted me to get a job here, remember? I’m the new buttonhook machine operator. I was just turning in my time card.

BELFRY: Excellent! My plan is coming together.  Now, all you need to do is figure out how to sabotage their machinery and they will go broke, I’ll take over their business and I will be rich! Rich, I tell you! (He laughs maniacally.)

VICTORIA:  I?

BELFRY:  Did I say “I”? Slip of the tongue, I assure you. Let me rephrase that. WE’LL be rich, rich, I tell you! (He laughs maniacally again.)

VICTORIA: I’m glad you’re happy! I have to report for work each day at 6:00! Did you hear me! SIX A.M.!

BELFRY:  So?

VICTORIA:  So, That’s usually when I am headed for bed after a night out on the town!

BELFRY:  (Glancing at a clock on the wall.) Curses! It’s almost six! I was so busy, I lost track of time! I need to get out of here before that Bowknot girl shows up!

VICTORIA:  And I’m working with my hands! It’s ruining my nails! And I have to schedule an appointment with my hairdresser because they make me wear a hairnet! A HAIRNET, for goodness sake!

BELFRY:  Yeah, that’s so your hair doesn’t get caught in the machinery. We do that in my factory, as a matter of fact.

VICTORIA: My goodness Bat. I never would have thought that you, of all people, would have safety concerns for your female employees!

BELFRY:  Safety, what safety? Have you seen what hair does to the mechanism of a buttonhook machine? And it costs a fortune to repair them!

VICTORIA:  I should have known. Well anyway, those stupid nets really mess up my hair and hairdressers don’t come cheap, you know!

BELFRY: Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to you after we finish our plan.

VICTORIA:  Well, there’s that full-length faux fur mink coat in the window at Le Chic department store. And I can always use a raise in salary.

BELFRY:  Yeah, sure, I’ll think about it. (Aside.) I thought about it. Never going to happen, but don’t tell her, I need her happy, if my plan is to succeed. (To VICTORIA.) Since it’s considered a business expense, I’ll have to clear it with the stockholders of B.B Buttonhooks International, of course.

VICTORIA:  Oh. Sure. Of course. (Aside.) Never going to happen is it? (To BELFRY) That reminds me. I’ve been meaning to ask you, why do you call your company B. B. Buttonhooks International? 

BRLFRY:  It’s pretty obvious isn’t it? The B. B. stands for Barton Belfry, we manufacture buttonhooks,  and we sell them internationally.

VICTORIA:  I’ve worked for you for five years, and I don’t recall any international sales.

BELFRY:  You’re forgetting that Winnipeg order we received last month.

VICTORIA:  So?

BELFRY. So, Winnipeg is in a foreign country.

VICTORIA:  It is? And here all the time I thought Winnipeg was in Montana….

BELFRY:  No, Winnipeg is in Canada, and that order makes us an international company.