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"Rustlers Revenge"

by D. Chapelle

Some Excerpts:

FELICITY. (Crossing to the table and having a seat.) Ready for your reading lesson, Harry.

HARRY. (Joining her at the table.) I was born ready, Miss Felicity!

(They sit side by side as Harry takes out his book. He is about to read when Pa enters looking over his shoulder.)

FELICITY. (Crossing to her father.) Hello, Father. (Pa startles.) Did Miss Hussy go home?

PA. No, but I wish she would. If she comes back tell her I didn't. You two going to do some reading?

FELICITY. Harry's getting quite good, Father.

PA. (As he is moving to exit.) Just remember, a little learning is a dangerous thing.

HARRY. What's that supposed to mean?

PA. Never learned that part of it. Too dangerous.

(Pa exits.)

FELICITY. (Crossing to stand behind Harry.) Ready, Harry?

HARRY. You betcha! (He opens the book and begins to read badly.) Flint Westwood walled ... walked into the smoked filled salon ... saloon and saw the three Pettis brothers at the bar.

FELICITY. That's very good, Harry.

HARRY. Thanks. (Back to the book.) The gay and merry pi-ano music ended suddenly as the pi-ano player saw the steely look in Flint's deep as-you-are eyes ...

FELICITY. Azure.

HARRY. Geshundheit.

FELICITY. It's a color, Harry.

HARRY. What color is it?

FELICITY. Blue.

HARRY. Then why not just say blue?

FELICITY. It's just a more interesting way of saying things.

HARRY. How can it be more interestin' if I don't know what they're talkin' about?

FELICITY. Keep reading, Harry.

HARRY. (Back to the book.) Silence filled the room as all eyes turned to Flint, his tall, lean, and ...(Felicity begins to read aloud with Harry.) muscular body filled the door of the saloon. Everybody knew Flint was there to do business and his business was bringing wrongdoers to justice. The card playing and drinking ended as the patrons parted as the waters of the Red Sea.

(Felicity takes the book and begins to read alone. Something seems to be coming over her.)

FELICITY. The bartender knew there was trouble coming and ducked for cover behind the thick mahogany bar. It was time for the Pettis to answer for their crimes. Tony, the oldest of the Pettis brothers and the meanest, asked if Westwood was there for them. Flint smiled a sad smile, showing ... showing his perfect white teeth and said, "Reckon I am."

HARRY. I read that part almost perfect.

FELICITY. Quiet Harry. (Back to reading.) Suddenly all three Pettis brothers moved for their six-shooters. All three were as fast as coiled rattle snakes. Fast they were, but not as fast as the gun of Flint Westwood.

 HARRY. Excitin', ain't it. 

FELICITY. Quiet Harry. (She continues to read.) Flint was faster, but he never used his shooting iron in anger, and always used it on the side of the law. His hand moved as gently as a spring breeze, but as fast as summer lightning. In the blink of an eye ... (Felicity is now fully into the story. The excitement has overtaken her. Her free hand shoots out and catches Harry on the jaw knocking him unconscious.) four six guns blaze fire like the heat from a hundred suns as lead flies between the forces of good and evil. The saloon is filled with the bitter smoke of gun-powered and the deafening sound of silence. (Felicity takes a deep breath to compose herself.) My ... that was ... exciting, Harry. Harry? Harry? (Felicity sees Harry face down on the table and tries to revive him.) Harry, are you all right?


FELICITY. Never!

PA. You tell him girl!

FELICITY. Pa, you've come to save me.

PA. Aya, but who's gonna save me?

(Sheila enters behind Pa with a gun aimed at his back. Sheila herds Pa down stage as Bart pulls Felicity to his side.)

SHEILA. So, Bart, looks like you've been a bad boy.

BART. Just doin' what comes natural. Sort of looks like you've been keepin' busy yourself.

SHEILA. Just doing what comes natural.

FELICITY. Bart! Wait a minute. You mean to say you really are Black Bart Bushwacker, the notorious rustler and bad man!?

BART. Sheila, ya ruined the darn surprise!

SHEILA. I am glad we found you Bart. You're just in time to witness a little signing party with Mr. Friendly here as guest of honor. (Sheila pushes Pa toward the papers.)

BART. (Leveling his gun at Pa.) Take one more step and it's your last. Felicity here is gonna sign everthing over to me.

(Bart pushes Felicity toward the papers.)

SHEILA. Take one more step and it'll be your last little girl.

FELICITY. I'll never sign the papers!

PA. Aya, and it's a good bet I won't be signing nothin'!

BART. Sign the papers or I'll shoot your pa!

SHEILA. Pa, sign the papers or I'll shoot your daughter.

BART. Sheila, you shoot the girl, and I'll plug ya!

SHEILA. You plug me, and I'll shoot the girl.

PA. Hope ya bought enough bullets for all of this shootin'.

FELICITY. Help! Help, will nobody help us?!